Battles Christians Face

Into the promised land

Into The Promised Land is a book by Jeanette Howard (author of Out of Egypt). This is a great resource for all who struggle with same sex attraction (men & women!) and for those who counsel them.

“Although any of the following is possible, our reward for a faithful walk away from homosexuality is not marriage and children, unambiguous heterosexuality or even a powerful life of ministry. Our reward is resting in God’s perfect plan for our life.”

Sounds tough, doesn’t it? Isn’t this what we all ultimately long for, to be content and at peace no matter our circumstances?

So we have come out of Egypt, decided to leave homosexuality behind us. But what now? The wilderness lies between us and the promised land of peace. In this book, Jeanette shares from her own painful experiences why we need to spend time in the wilderness, and what happens with us while we are there.

There are some questions we need to ask ourselves before proceeding into the “meat” of the book:

• Am I willing to admit my struggles and explore the freedom of being real in Christ?
• Where is my security really?
• Have I the courage to stand against popular opinion?
• Are there still some of the treasures of Egypt that I carry around from day to day, almost like a comfort blanket?

Are we willing to face the truth of these questions in our lives? If so, then jump into this book – it contains so many pearls of great value to us.

The wilderness is all about God teaching us to live in weakness, completely dependent upon His strength. It is about learning to surrender everything to Him, not just the parts we are happy with, but also the weakest parts of ourselves. It is here that we learn about the enemies we will face, and the boundaries we need to set. This is where we fight our internal battle, and learn to “be”, so that we are prepared and armed to fight the external battles when we claim the Promised Land. It is not something to rush through, but a time of simply being with God and learning to trust Him in everything.

Once we step into the Promised Land, the battle is not over. Now we need to practise everything we have learned. The resources that were available to Joshua are available to us today – the Bible, the voice of God, the leadership of Jesus and the freedom to obey. We need to maintain an eternal perspective, learn to be content, and find true joy in the presence of God. It is only in the presence of God that we will be able to discern the lies of the enemy, and the untruths in the “voice of reason” of public opinion.

For some, choosing this road will mean learning to live with loss – the loss of intimate companionship, the loss of never having children. It is only possible to overcome these losses when our love for God exceeds anything we might experience in a human relationship. We need to be “in love with God”, or we will never move on from our object of loss.

 “Maturing in Christ requires an ever-broadening vision that compels us to meet other people’s needs rather than seek our own comfort, to serve rather than be served, and to know that, as we daily pick up our cross, we are walking in the footsteps of our Lord.”

“As you make progress through the Promised Land, you will encounter strongholds and difficulties. There will be people who oppose you and others who tempt you to stray from your determined path. But there will be many fellow pilgrims pursuing a similar holy goal. Let their commitment and determination encourage you in your efforts so that you, too, may encourage those who follow.”

Copies are available from the TfT office, price £7.99 (including p&p). Please contact us if you would like a copy or order it from Amazon.

Leaving homosexuality

This is an honest and encouraging book, where Alan Chambers speaks candidly about his own journey. He is clear up front that the journey away from a homosexual lifestyle is not an easy one and that it can't be done alone. His own story, which he shares plenty of throughout the book, is one of finding freedom through relationships with God and other people. His chapter on "Dating, Marriage and Yes... Sex" is particularly helpful, in that it is realistic about what might await a same-sex attracted person in a marriage. 
Refreshingly, Alan Chambers resists writing about matters in which he has no personal experience: the chapter on Lesbianism is written by Yvette Schneider. 
Overall, this is a short but rich book of a personal journey into freedom and wholeness through forgiveness, authenticity, courage, community and relationship with God. Please contact us if you would like a copy or order it from Amazon.

Out of the blue

An earlier book by Martin Hallett, Out of the Blue, was out of print but is now available in booklet form (price £3) and electronically via the link above (free of charge). This is especially helpful for parents, relatives and friends of those with same sex issues. To download your own copy, please click on the attached file below.

Here is a review of the book by Gabe, a TfT member:

Through getting to know Martin Hallett and TfT and also working with HIV and AIDS situations I moved from being unsympathetic and ill informed about homosexuality to becoming a student of the difficulties surrounding men and women revealing their same sex attraction to Christian parents, friends and colleagues. I’m still learning.

Martin’s book adds greatly to my understanding. His detailed descriptions of personal experiences, and those of many hundreds who have shared their ‘stories’ with him, leaves no one in doubt that fear, misunderstanding and prejudice are an inherent part of same sex attraction.

Believer or atheist, gay or straight, this very human account of people revealing their SSA to loved ones and the positive or negative consequences of the revelation will not fail to increase one’s understanding of how best to love and support them.

Still learning to love

Still Learning to Love is the title of Martin Hallett's book. It is available directly from TfT. Please contact us to order a copy. The price is £7.99 (including p&p) in the UK. It can also be purchased from Amazon.

Still Learning to Love charts Martin Hallet's journey into faith, and how God urged this shy man to found a controversial ministry. Giving a historical account of Martin's early life and the beginnings of TfT, this book covers issues that many in TfT face, such as loneliness, struggling with liberal theology and being 'the only gay in the village' who doesn't fit into 'normal' church catgeories.

However, Martin shares many more triumphs than tragedies, and a lifestyle with which every Christian can identify - the absolute need for a strong prayer life, to live according to Scripture and fellowship. Martin's testimony is a witness of God honouring faith and commitment to Him, doing immeasurably more than we could possibly imagine.

Martin encourages us to value our own testimony as a witness to others, and as a way of understanding and helping others as Scripture decrees.

Isaiah 6:8 - 'Then I heard the voice of the Lord asking, "Whom shall I send as a messenger to My people? Who will go for Us?" And I said, "Lord, I'll go! Send me."

This book by Jenell Williams Paris looks at the issue of who we are, in the context of a world of people defining themselves as 'straight', 'gay', 'bi' etc. Here are some reviews worth looking at:

http://www.peter-ould.net/2011/06/16/the-end-of-sexual-identity-a-review/

http://tgcreviews.com/reviews/the-end-of-sexual-identity/

There is a really helpful quote in the second review above (written by Wesley Hill):

“The major problem with heterosexuality, and sexual identity in general,” Paris argues, “is that it is a social construct that provides a faulty pattern for understanding what it means to be human, linking desire to identity in a way that violates biblical themes.” Some might be inclined to think that Christian faith encourages only those self-identifying as “homosexual” to abandon their label, but Paris insists that the call to renunciation cuts in all directions. Heterosexuals should not negate homosexual identities while shoring up their own. Rather, every group that finds its identity in a particular configuration of sexual desire is summoned by the gospel to lay down this marker of personhood and take up the only one that really matters. What we need, according to Paris, is a “post-sexual identity church” in which “there’s no moral high ground for heterosexuals and no closet for homosexuals. There’s just people, each of whom is lover and loved.”

This reminds us of what Paul writes in Galatians 3:28. If we are hidden with Christ in God (Colossians 3:3), then there is no need for us to find identity in labels like 'gay' or 'straight', 'single' or 'married', 'male' or 'female', 'Anglican' or 'Baptist'. If truly we find our security and worth in Christ, then we don't need to worry about living up to the expectations of ourselves of others: we are truly free from their burden. As Paul quotes in Acts 17:28, "For in him we live and move and have our being". That is freedom indeed.

Walking with gay friends

Published in 2007, Walking with gay friends by Alex Tylee equips friends, familiies and the wider church understand and reach out to gay people. You can purchase it directly from IVP or Amazon.

Alex’s desire is to write a book to help people share their faith with people from the gay community. That means she treads on controversial ground! But she does so in a sensitive and compassionate way.

The first chapter is a testimony to Alex’s own struggles with her sexuality. She goes on to describe how she was converted to Christianity, and has now made the commitment to reject any same-sex sexual relationship. Alex takes seriously the Bible as God’s word, and its clear teaching that sexual expression is reserved for heterosexual marriage. But because she shares her own struggles so honestly, and quotes other people who also live with same sex attraction, all she says in the rest of the book is sown with threads of credibility, experience, and compassion. The book offers great wisdom in understanding of all the issues involved with walking with our gay friends.

"Washed and waiting" is a helpful book. The author, Wesley Hill has produced a thoughtful description of the reality of living with unwanted desires for others of the same sex. The structure of the book strongly connects the stories of individuals with the truths of the Bible. The book is split into 3 sections, each of which begins with a story of a man who has struggled in this way: the first of these stories is Wesley's own. The other two stories are of Henry Nouwen and Gerard Manley Hopkins.

In terms of themes, this book covers well the issues of purpose, hope, loneliness and shame.